My mom teaches Kindergarten and I went to her classroom a few days ago and saw what appeared to be a small shrine dedicated to Jodie Foster in the corner of the room and I had literally no idea why it was there, so I asked my mom about it and she said it’s where the kids can go to tattle on each other so they don’t always do it to her
So basically my mom tells her little Kindergarteners to tell on each other to a magazine clipping of Jodie Foster that they call Miss Tattle and if you don’t think that’s the funniest thing then get out of my face
*pronounces “hors d’oeuvres” as “horse divorce”*
Near death metal
"You plagiarized a sentence in an essay? Expelled & we’ll make it hard for you to enroll into another school ever again."
"You raped and assaulted a student on campus? You can come back to school."
fuck the education system
The Sims 4
skeleton smartypants was defeated once and for all
THE REACTION FACES JUST MAKE THIS 84927 TIMES FUNNIER
This is my kind of humor
freshmen advice: y’all know bout high school musical right?? well that shit is legit. better get practicing. everyday at lunch we go hard af. stick to the status quo.
The difference between period pains and getting kicked in the balls is that one is a compulsory monthly event and the other one is probably because you were being a dick.
|—||Uzo Aduba’s mother proving that the idea of not being able to pronounce a POC’s name because it’s “too hard” or “too complicated” is complete bullshit and actually just laziness. (via cosmicspread)|
bioware: you get asexuality!!! and you get a gay romance!!! and you get a lesbian romance!!! this character is bisexual!!! this character is pansexual!!! a romance doesn’t necessarily involve sex!!! inclusivity is important!!!
ubisoft:women??? bige titty??? nip nops
White People: The Middle East is so barbaric. They’ll cut off a person’s hand just for stealing!
White People when an unarmed black kid is murdered by police in America: Yeah, but he shoplifted some cigarillos, so…
this is the last one!